When I was a child, I read a lot of novels. Malay ones, especially. From that, I wished and I wanted only one man in my life as my partner. Let him be the first and the last. I know my weaknesses. I can’t bear with loses last time, but as time goes by, experiences taught me to be strong and not to fall on whatever come across.
Frankly speaking, living in a hostel life wasn’t on my list at all. As a primary student, I always thought my high school life will finish in my old school, but my expectation was wrong. My parents sent me to a boarding school with a very high hope in me. Wanting me to be a better person and to make them proud. I know until now I am not like that, due to certain circumstances, I became an ignorant girl. Disrespectful. Im sorry, I realize that, and I’ll try to change, God willing.
Reminiscing everything I had gone through there, the pain I felt, the blames I got, the talks I heard, the happiness I shared with my friends, the memories I had, I can’t miss any. I love it there. I love being with my friends there. They’re the one who lighten up my world there. Accepted me for who I am, was there with me through thick and thin, I don’t want to lose them.
In life, when you’re walking with your friends, laughing and jokes around then you tripped over something and fell. You know no one realize it because they’re busy with the happiness, with the joy they’re having, but there’ll be this one person who will turn around, who saw you on the floor. The person will come and help to get you on your feet and ask you if you were okay. Walk along with you to catch up the rest in front of you. That one person is your true friend. They’re not your fair weather friends. They’re the pearl among the glass. You should keep and treat them well because they are not replacements for true friends. Keep them, I tell you.
You know, sometimes I feel like throwing you away from my life just because you caught my eyes. I don’t want to fall for you because I don’t want to pay the cost I have to deal with later. I don’t want that feelings. Guess now I have to face the fact that I lost the game. As much as I don’t want to lose you, but sometimes I can’t help it from walking away from you. Trying to stay far from you just to make me get rid of you easily. You’re not mine and I must suck it up no matter what. I’m sorry if I hurt you, it’s better like this, I supposed
